11

I hate November.

1.  It is cold in the morning, so you wear layers so you can survive; then in the middle of the day it get hot- maybe layers wasn't such a good idea.
2.  3rd lap of school.  Everything is finishing, but you have at least a month to go.
3.  Thanksgiving: worst holiday ever.
4.  Work gets hectic, its also the best month to work on a job application if you have no job (holiday hiring)
5.  Audition month.
6.  I ...


I don't like this game anymore.
I don't like any games.
I didn't want to do anything last night but wait.
Wait...

Oh well, I deserve to be used.  And I asked for it, even though I knew it would make me sick.

Last night, a friend in distress called me.  I told her I could hang with her until midnight.  So I picked her up, drove to nowhere, and stared through the moonroof at the stars.  She didn't look at the stars that long.  She kept looking at me.  I knew what she wanted.  It makes me sick.  Why can't you people say what you want?
I'm not afraid of throwing my life away.
I'm not afraid of throwing away my happiness, my health, my present.
I sort of gave her what she wanted, I made out for like a minute.  Makes me sick feeling.  I don't want to think about it.
Then i curled up in a ball.
She asked me if I was okay.
I asked her if she was okay.
She forgot about me and started talking about herself.

The way it should be.



stay beautiful