Mind Out In

I'm out of my Mind because I'm stuck in it.
No. I cannot explain.

I saw an old friend and she said "you lost weight": it felt so good to hear that. Then she said "...you could die". No.
Give me some credit. People say to me all the time "You are Genius!" I'm not going to die like this... I'm smart.

Smart = I'm going to eat tonight, we have this small thanksgiving get together with friends... and because I'm smart I shall eat.
I'd like to tell you the progress I've made, but I do not have a clue.
I can't remember what I ate, or didn't eat...
How many push-ups I did. What other activities I did. I seriously do not know.

I can give blood in 2 days. And I will. So if it kills me... That might be a good way to die.
I just told you I will not die. But I'm kind of hoping that giving blood is as serious as they say. Because it never is... Giving blood was the same to me as getting a shot. It stings, the bandage looks like a bandage and hurts when you take it off, and you don't feel lighter or light headed or anything. Well, except the thing where when I get poked for a needle to give blood I black out- remain 100% conscious, but I see black for a while- I'm fine. I can talk all the way through it. I feel better really fast. I bleed out in about 6 minutes. I can do it. I won't die, even though I would like to... just a little.

I want to die just a little.

Stay Beautiful