Magic

I showed one of my friends how to ask for a girl's phone number.
I have to say, it is people from prettythin and prettyalone that have built my confidence enough so I can talk to beautiful people.  You are all so beautiful.  I miss you all the time.

I skipped class today.
I'm really afraid of failing, but I felt like I couldn't think straight.  I was reading my book, but I couldn't think while reading.  My normal reading experience is extraordinary, while my eyes find the words my mind traces the imagery and scenery.  Sometimes I even see the events taking place, or I will change them in my mind.  Of course to continue I have to reread the words to make sure I understand what is really going on in the story.  This is why I like Epics, they have some of the richest settings and keep me from deviating too much from the story.  Before I skipped class I was reading, and there was nothing but words.  My head physically hurt and I tried to read but all I got was words.

I couldn't have concentrated in class either.  In fact, for those classes I did show up to, my focus was far lower than regular.  I'm becoming a failure.


I had to nap.  Still things are going wrong.  But some things are resolving.  I have to say that getting that girl's number (I failed to mention this, but my friend has a crush on this girl) boosted the experience of today.  She is pretty, but I should realize that there are people in the world who's lives I don't belong in.
Knowing her will be a pleasant experience for me.

I don't see myself being more than I am now.

I feel like I have hit a wall.

I feel like I can't get better.

I can't do what I strive to do each day.

Each day I learn, I forget something else.

And I don't know enough to know what I must retain for life.

I don't know enough to retain anything for life.

I'm getting weaker and weaker each day.

I can't stand it.

Because of this... I dislike what I am.

I must change

stay beautiful