Millstone

Rarefied millstone.
I don't even know my own words.  I just remember them.  Sorry.  This post is going to be confusing.
Its all because I've been such a mystery.
And not many people talk to me.
Yet I've been talking a lot more
Just to myself
or the other guy... the one I pretend to be.

I don't mind being kind.
But I would rather get work done.  Get my work done.  Before I help you with yours.  I need a 2 year dream.
I need something I can do in 2 years.  So I can have a place.
And I can provide.
Not going to lie.  I just want a house.
I want a house so I can shelter people.
First Rosie.
Gosh... Appendix, you are invited.  I'd pay for your plane ticket if I could.  If I had a house and I couldn't afford your ticket... well I'd borrow money to get you here.  I'd help you die the easy way, I mean, you always talk about dying.  I'd just want to help ya know?
Yeah... you're cool.
Forserious... I like that word.
Forrealz: I also made it up.
Forwhys?
I dunno.

Millstones.  When I think of them I think of corn underneath rock being ground into powder becoming less than cornmeal.  Mush mush.  Mush mush.
Who would want to eat that?


Oh yes... the protein diet.  Has been going well.
How do people not have food in their houses?
oh... and I'm helping a friend be homeless, because right now (runonsentence approaching) she is in a relationship with a guy, his girlfriend, the ex-girlfriend, killed herself in his room, and then he got together with this friend of mine 9 days later, so then like I'm like. woah, if my gf killed herself I'd be like 2 weeks before I hookup again right?  Well, he is schizo so its okay, but really he is a human, we are all human, don't judge the guy, so I won't.  Then he like does stuff like drugs her and feels her up when she sleeps and I'm like, get out, forserious, I'll help you become homeless, I'll drive you to a shelter (by the way, I might want to volunteer at one of those just for love- and by that I mean... because butterfly would want me to) and like bring your stuff with you, so its a good idea and it might happen.  Yeah.  Lifesgood.
Don't know why, but I hate being stuck where I am.  Like reality am.
I hate being stuck where I really am.
I hate having to be here when I am here.
Do you get it?

Why does language...
Have to be so difficult to...
use.


screw life.
Stay beautiful