To protect humans

Confessions:
I gained a friend a while ago and found a clip where a pornstar looks like her.  I'm facinated, usually I delete these things right after seeing them, but not this one.
Oh, and I watch porn.  Its not the same as other people.  I think about what is going on in me and what is going on in the actors.  I can sense discomfort if there is any.
I visit Craigslist daily.  I look in the personals.  I'm trying to find someone lonely, local, and lunatic.  Someone I'd get along with.  I fear reading the posts written by laymen and laywomen are denting my intelligence.  I really want to stop, but its a habit now.   I literally have checked almost every day for a year at least.

That is all for now.


Now...
What a strange word.  In sign language the sign for now is the same sign for Today.  The word pretty much means the present.  This moment.  The moment the word is said.


I'm leaving this topic.  Trying to arrive somewhere by talking about something else.
Now, when I think about what I've accomplished today I feel like I've done quite a bit.  But when I try to determine how I feel right now I predominately think bloated stomach.  I wish I could have more time to deal with this issue.
I'm afraid that a friend has brought to light how multitasking can cause one to be fat.  With so much diffusion of focus meals can be excessive.  And everyone knows if you eat more than you can use you get fat.  Multi tasking doesn't just diffuse focus, but diffuses energy; the amount of energy focused on one task is lessened because another task is piggy-backing off the other.  For instance, today I played Super Smash Brothers Brawl Minus while doing push-ups between rounds.  Smash Brothers Minus is an exciting game for me, it can elevate my heart rate, and the push-ups provide a workout; a good one today because I achieved 1000 push-ups in repetitions of 40 or 30.  The point: the calories burned playing the game, while few, overlapped with the calories burned doing push-ups.  Its the same thing if you try to dance to music while cleaning or watch television while cooking.  You're not burning as much as if you did both separately.
 So this goes back to now because it makes me think of what does now mean.  Now means the one thing going on at the moment.  If that one thing is two things, then its not quite the same now...
I wonder what we call it then.


And this is completely unrelated
But I have no clue what is going on in my mind at the moment.


I wonder what is happening right
 now




stay beautiful