Dearest Leavers

I have a problem of never wanting to move on.
I miss her... In fact she might even come by sometime to read this.
Who? Well she deleted everything. I doubt she wants to be spoken of... or to.


Have you ever dreamt about something that could come true?
Those are the dreams that really stick with me.


What happened when reality turns up and things get the chance to get better, but then you don't take that chance. Will those be the new dreams?
I think I'm going to be stuck here for a while. That is why I need some money. Modest survival. Transportation. Warmth. I just need enough money for these things. I'll work out the rest with just a bit left over. Or I will... find something free to enjoy.
Or maybe another job.
Work doesn't tire me very much.
Its getting over the fears of applying that hurts the most. If I can just do it... I've applied... I just need to do the rest of the trials.

So many things at my back. Always. Right now these things make me feel like I stand alone, but when I am alone and have the time to myself my memories remind me that I used to have people. I used to talk with people I cared about.
I even talked to her once.
I still miss her words.


I'll just have to keep trying and maybe some new memory will come up to block the old one

Stay beautiful