You do it

suddenly I am able to type much faster than I have been able to in the past.
And that sentence took so many attempts... it wasn't even worth the effort.

I've been full in terms of food.
empty in terms of company.

Hm...
Isn't is foreign to have people around but feel just as empty as when they aren't?
It gets even worse when they leave, like the stopper pulled out of the bathtub. Let the water drain away.

It interferes with the way I concentrate. If I want people I tend to think about that.
When my mind doesn't have that burden it can do so much more.

I'm learning things.
Learning that I still don't exceed as a student. That work takes too much work. That the system is built to train slaves- and I mean it, because so many of these people do work without using their mind; searching for the correct answer without the reason for even starting the problem. That being stupid has many advantages.
oh... and I've learned a few things about hybridized orbitals. But not enough about that.
I've learned far too much of the inefficiencies of bureaucracy and how people in the government structures use this system to benefit their own self.
I see around me the products of nights of fun, spent without any consideration of price- whether it be money or health. I think that... one of the reasons I have been so healthy is because I want to lead by example on how to manage the simple things.


and yet I'll never get what I want.

And I don't see myself making the sacrifices to my meals anytime soon to lose weight.
I see myself gaining weight in the future.
I'm actually no excited for the holidays.
I don't want to be around for those.



stay beautiful