Waiting

I couldn't do it on my own.  I can push myself, but as soon as it gets hard I quit now.
I took a 7 mile walk tonight.  Everything is getting easier.  And its all because...

I've eaten.
I've fallen in love with food.


Do you know a feeling of fireworks when you think of someone.  Sparks when you see their face.  Your face lights up when you get a text from them.
Yeah, food has been doing that to me.
I love food right now.
It makes me so happy.

I only couldn't eat meatloaf tonight because meat like that doesn't feel good.  If I had a choice I would have said no to it anyways.  I think ground meat is a waste of calories.  If you eat something it should be beneficial.  Meat isn't good enough.
Usually taste makes no difference to me.  Food is all about nutritional value.  Its why I eat plain yogurt instead of flavored so often, or why I eat spinach plain, or why I like all my vegetables.  Because I don't care as much about taste as I do nutrition.  If something tastes bad, but is good, I will eat it.
I've eaten everything.  I had 3 lunches today.

3 lunches does not equal 7 miles.
No.


I've also gotten that wonderful sparkly feeling from Milk.  Or is she Squash?


I had the day off of work today.  I thought I would work today.
So when I went in and wasn't on the schedule I called a friend.
I gave her butterflies.
I could tell.

There was a moment when she wanted me to lean in a little closer.
But I wasn't going to do anything so kind and cruel.
She has the most beautiful hands and feet.  This other girl I have been friends with since high school.


Does it matter?
I'm just a love toy for other people.
Waiting for the real thing to myself.



stay beautiful